The one where Is Von Wafer the Altered Beast?  Video evidence says yes. Compare this:

With this:

The video evidence is pretty clear.  I made this observation in one of the Rocket posts from last week, but it might need some ’splainin. Von Wizzile “rose from his grave“, if you will, on Thursday and played through a bad back.  This might not sound like a big deal, but if you’ve ever had back problems, you know that you can’t do a damn thing in life without it.  I had a herniated disk in high school, and I’m still complaining about it 13 years later.  Von Wafer is a man.  A man with a mohawk and big testicles.  Oh, and this:

Its game time foolz!

The other interesting thing is that we got sued for eleven billionty dollars. Rex sent me this text yesterday: “Check your email. We got sued.” Without further detail, and off the top of my head, I thought of 30 things we’ve done that would piss people off, and I’ve been with FaF less than 2 months. Some might think of the internet as the decline of Western Civilization, and point to the aforementioned information as proof. This is what I’d say to those people: 8==> O;

On to your Pejorative Falsehood Local Houston Sports Updates:

Rockets: Oh, baby! Here we go.  I’d say don’t start no shit, won’t be no shit, but it is too late for that.

Best Music Masher Ever: Girl Talk. If you like song mash-ups (and who doesn’t?), you will LOVE you some Girl Talk. Go get the entire Feed the Animals LP as quickly as possible.  Since I’m in a youtubes mood today, I defy you to watch the below fan-made video and not shake your booty (nsfw, unless your work is totally awesome). Dear 8 lb 6 oz Baby Jesus, please let Girl Talk have gotten all of his licensing paperwork done right – we can only handle one lawsuit per week. Thank you, Baby Jesus.

Astros: Beat Hotlanta 7-5. Inching toward mediocrity…

Texans: Texanstalk.com reports that Brian Cushing is going to take action against nfldraftbible.com, the site that erroneously reported that he tested positive for steroids. Cush-Lash, how are you going to sue the Bible? Also, stop doing interviews with media outlets that a) aren’t us and b) aren’t in the city you’ll be playing in. Austin is 3 hours away! Look on a map. The only thing they care about in Austin is the current state legislative session the Longhorns. How does that help you?  Quit alienating us or we’ll post unflattering pictures of you trade you in our Madden Franchise when the game comes out.

Crab grass:  I’m taking a second Point of Personal Privilege. Fuck you, crab grass. Spreading so quick and shit. What, because I don’t mow you for 6 weeks, you have to go and grow at a tremendous rate?

Dynamii: Played yesterday (!?!) against the New England Revolution and won.  The Dynamo have a really cool website, btw. Check it out. Well played, sirs.

Aeros: Tied 1-1 with the Milwaukee Admirals. I’ve run out of things to say about hockey.

Photo from here. Don’t sue us.