The FaFU is a weekly link-dump usually laced with seething sarcasm, gross exaggeration and a multitude of four letter words (like “Rice”).  Being that we’re a reformed blog, with THE Random Guy leading the charge (and not being able to shut his pie-hole about it) this is the “Family Friendly FaFHU.”  Take notes kids, that means “Fourth and Fifty Hearts U!”

10) Google Wave – It’s no secret that Google is taking over the world little by little.  You could say that they were the opposite of GM in this certain scenario.  Google continues to amaze with the unveiling of Google Wave.  This in particular tickled Pipez (above the bathing suit line) who is partial to the usual 76 reply-count e-mails that we usually send between our group when coordinating a trip to Las Vegas.  If you can make it through the entire hour and a half of video you will encounter two things:  1) The overwhelming (almost sickening) glee of the Google sycophants in the room and 2) [Nerd Alert!!] The coolest automatic language text translator you’ve ever seen.

9) THE Random Guy – You’re truly a trend-setter.  When I wrote that you were “Tenured Author/Guest Editor/FaF Muse” I was just trying to massage your ego and shut you up because you didn’t like the fact you weren’t listed as “editor.”  But this new “no cussing” thesis is truly genius.  I feel so enlightened.  The shackles of low-brow, unthinking humor are finally gone.  I referenced the SimCity Arcologies and Scientology’s Xenu yesterday!  Do you think I would have done that if I had relegated myself to four letter words?  No, and no once more, good sir.

8) Arnie’s Pizza Shop – I (heart) things that make me remember the past.  Last week a reader sent me a clip that took me back to the days of Lone Star and beer pong: Arnie’s Pizza Shop.  Who do we have to thank for this piece of internet nostalgia?  Group X, once again, of course.

7) Free Press SummerFest – Sure, Austin might have ACL and SXSW and Fun-Fun-Fun-Fest but Houston’s about to have a music festival of our own.  The Free Press SummerFest is set to be held at Eleanor Tinsley Park on August 8th and 9th.  It’s cheap too.  Seven buckaroos for a one-day pass.  Thirty-five for a two-day “Fancy Pants” pass.  Though, I don’t think that they compare to John Daly’s fancy pants.

6) The Cleveland Show – No, not a show based on the clips that we linked to you before (found here and here).  Those are too crass.  A show based off some dudes with a video camera making fun of their city isn’t fit for network television.  Some would say neither is the Family Guy (and those people are entitled to their opinions, begrudgingly).  That didn’t stop Fox from making the spin-off The Cleveland Show:

5) Mayne Street – Kenny Mayne!!!  You’ve been gone for so long!  I missed you, you spiky gray-haired devil.  Thank goodness that you’re back with your ESPN Digital Shorts, Mayne Street.  Finally there’s something on ESPN.com that I don’t have to hear on repeat for 24 hours straight.  You are truly a bright spot in my afternoon.  A little ray of witty sunshine seeping into my windowless office.

4) Man’s Best Friend – PUPPIES!  Yay for puppies and kitty-kats and gerbils!  Especially when you dressed up so cute and cuddly.  I don’t think that you’re Pets That Want to Kill Themselves, you’re more like an inspiration to naked animals all over the planet.

3) Owen Daniels – Oh, Owen Daniels, you little scamp.  Taking your fight for a new contract to the interwebs?  That’s just adorable.  You should tweet about it sometime.  Facebook just isn’t en vogue anymore.  Get that buzz-factor that you really need by getting a Twitter account.  You get those big, bad Texans main-office dudes.  You’ll force them into a virtual internet corner.  They’ll have to offer you a better contract… you know, because you’re a Pro Bowler now (ummm even though you only made it because someone else dropped out of their commitment).

2) Dating Advice – I’m losing steam… Too… Hard… Being… Nice… But, I must prevail.  I must do it for TRG’s sake, for his child, for OUR FUTURE!  Reginald Blackstone wondered why I never give him dating advice the other day.  First of all, I’m not one that you would want that kind of advice from unless you like your flings to end spectacularly after only a month’s time.  Second, I can’t give any better advice than Holy Taco manages (and in computer voiced video to boot!).

1) Waving Goats – AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!  I CAN’T TAKE IT ANYMORE!!  REALLY?!?!  A WAVING (MOTHER FUCKING) GOAT?!  YOU HAVE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME!  FUCK YOU, UNITED KINGDOM.  FUCK YOU, WANKS MACGRUBER YOU SLUT OF THE BASTARD CHILD OF BENEDICT ARNOLD!  FUCK YOU ALL!!  FUCK. FUCK. FUCK. COCK. SHIT. BALLS!!

- Septimus FUCKING Rex

[Photo is the album cover of the Eagles of Death Metal - Heart On]