Song of the Day: The Knux – “Bang! Bang!“
Holy shit!
I read a lot on the intertubez these days. Contrary to popular belief, “reading” does not mean “ogling at porn” (though the two are not mutually exclusive either). This particular piece of mindfuckery was found over on FilmDrunk. Now, by all means I’m not a Kayne West fan (maybe the music, but the dude is has more screws loose than Ron Artest), but this video by Spike Jonze is pretty awesome. Make it to the 9-minute mark and you will be thoroughly surprised.
Maybe not as surprised as when you saw this:

And especially not as surprising as this one:
I seriously could watch that last video all day long just to watch Mike Meyers’ face over and over. Chris Tucker even looks shell-shocked.
IMPORTANT: INCOMING SPORTS SEGUE!!!
Even more surprising than the walking ego, Kanye West, is the fact that a couple-three AP writers still manage to keep the University of Houston off of their Top 25 ballots. With the Cougars climbing the polls once again after the embarrassing loss to UTEP they’ve broken into the top 20 teams we take a look at some of the specifics. There are some injustices to address.
- Scott Wolf – Los Angeles Daily News (Ballot)
- Israel Gutierrez – Miami Herald (Ballot)
- Craig James – ESPN (Ballot)
Those are your guilty parties. Have at them, FaFtonians. Someone besides Scampi deserves your scorn on this day.
The highest the Coogs got ranked was #13 by four different writers. The lowest was #25 by one. But, to not make the ballot at all is a sin (especially if you take a look at how those three people in particular slated their ballots). Far be it for me to cry “foul” and “it’s a travesty” week in and week out. I don’t think I’m alone in thinking that H-Town deserves a bit more than that.
On to the rest of your Houston sports updates:
TEXANS: TEXANS TEXANS “>TEXANS “>TEXANS “>TEXANS “>TEXANS TEXANS TEXANS TEXANS!!! Do you think that was enough “TEXANS” for you, oneton? One more? TEXANS!!! I love how the default article for Houston is about Gary Kubiak and his more hot than warm seat as the head coach of the Texans. Being a sports writer must be hard work, especially since the outlets they work for don’t allow them to use the vulgar vocabulary that Fourth and Fifty is beginning to be recognized before. They have to write things like “[Kubiak] is embattled.” Whereas, I can write “Gary best watch the fuck out lest he get a reaming like Elton John’s choade.” Countdown to the beginning of a Houston Texans win streak: 5 days.
Texans start out the week as a three-point favorite against San Francisco who are coming off a bye week. Houston hopes to extend their winning ways at home on Sunday but it’s never been easy for them to win back to back games. They have only had two win-streaks (longer than two games) since Kubiak came on board (and those were both last year… a streak of 3 and 4).
ASTROS – The Houston Astros are finished with their first round of interviews for the manager position with the club. That leaves them only a month or two left before they bypass all reason and make a stupid hire. I’m excited, are you?
Your candidates so far are Red Sox bench coach Brad Mills; Red Sox first-base coach Tim Bogar; interim manager Dave Clark; minor league field coordinator Al Pedrique; former Milwaukee manager Ned Yost; San Diego hitting coach Randy Ready; former Seattle and Arizona manager Bob Melvin; former Washington manager Manny Acta, former Astros manager Phil Garner and Philadelphia bench coach Pete Mackanin… Lot’s of name recognition in that bunch…
ROCKETS – Chase Budinger is a budding star… That loose rhyme was about as good as the OK City Thunder’s play last night as the Houston Rockets won 105-85.
DYNAMO – Regular season comes to a close next weekend against Chivas USA. Currently, Houston’s tied for the Western conference lead with Chivas Regal and the LA Galaxy… I lost you at “Dynamo” didn’t I?
- Septimus Rex
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“Elton John’s Choade” is the theme of the week? Cuz you sound like sports radio 610 today, where the texans get more play than Elton John’s choade. But anyways, enough about rimming the Texans. I don’t know what good it would do to contact Craig James. Leaving Houston off his ballot was an obvious slight…It’s a personal issue he has having played at SMU and calling the game in which his son’s team lost. He had to study the OSU game and saw the Tech game first hand, so there is no explaining it away…he might as well just own it. The beauty is that he obviously has a problem with UH, but his 1 vote does a minute amount in keeping UH from climbing the polls…and the average sports fan would not go so far as to notice that Craig James (and all the weight he pulls in the sports world…right) doesn’t think UH should be ranked. Scampi on the other hand puts anything negative about UH on blast to the whole city. But if you want to supply CJ’s email…and his son’s cell phone number, I have time to make a couple death threats.
Crag James is muther-fuckery wrapped in a douche-bag, with Elton’s choade-piece as a hat.
On another note, do you guys think you could add a section for Colt McCoy injury reports. That guy has had a rougher go of it than Elton John’s choade. And, It’s good to know what’s going on with him so we can handicap him for the heisman race. I know he’s been facing a lot of adversity (read: making excuses) all season.